Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Sunday, October 18, 2009
post tonga room re-greet
it had been years since i'd seen this person. we dated almost 20 years ago. he was in a relationship when we dated (though he told me it was "open", it wasn't...and i was dumb and young enough to believe).
just to give a little background.
now, divorced to said woman (not) mentioned above and sharing custody of their 12 year old daughter...who sounds just like him from how he describes her behavior to me
he found me on facebook six months ago. first he sent an apology email, and after a few days i decided, okay, what's the harm in being this person's friend? so i did. what transpired in the following six months or so....flirty communications, suggestive texts and emails (mostly from his side - as i'd seen his pic and noticed how fat and unattractive he had become...old man in america)
---------
he was in my town (still is, acutally) this weekend.
i went to meet him (me with friend in tow) for a drink on friday night. i was right, he was fat. he was unattractive. and like the phone conversations we'd had, hee was self centered and boring. i haven't been with a man in a long time, so i continued to drink him pretty.
we kissed goodnight and for me there was no magic. no sparks, nothing. just the ringing endorsement that came in a sleazy text later telling me that i'm a good kisser and calling himself "daddy" ick!
we met on saturday and for me, it was a special little disastoer.
i didn't want to spend time with him and it was obvious. i put my complainer cap on and eventually it got the better of him. we left each other unceremoniously, except for a few sharp words flying through the humid day at each other.
i got home and wrote the following email. i will probably never send it, unless duly provoked!
i think that maybe the changes you have taken yourself and the ones that i have taken myself through are really different. you don't seem like you've changed all that much, 'cept now you have a daughter, wear glasses, and have a big belly.
enjoy your time. honestly, i'm happier sitting alone in my apt. (if i wind up doing that) than hanging out with you. i kind of figured this might be true by our phone conversations. you bored me then, and you bored me more today because i had to look at your mug.my responses to you today, seemed congruous with the energy between us. i found you superfluously talking about you, you, your experiences, you and then...oh, how awful i am...
your knee hurts because you are overweight and out of shape.
deal with it or it will get worse and make you even less attractive.
i'm just telling you how I'M feeling.
jerky, isn't it?
just to give a little background.
now, divorced to said woman (not) mentioned above and sharing custody of their 12 year old daughter...who sounds just like him from how he describes her behavior to me
he found me on facebook six months ago. first he sent an apology email, and after a few days i decided, okay, what's the harm in being this person's friend? so i did. what transpired in the following six months or so....flirty communications, suggestive texts and emails (mostly from his side - as i'd seen his pic and noticed how fat and unattractive he had become...old man in america)
---------
he was in my town (still is, acutally) this weekend.
i went to meet him (me with friend in tow) for a drink on friday night. i was right, he was fat. he was unattractive. and like the phone conversations we'd had, hee was self centered and boring. i haven't been with a man in a long time, so i continued to drink him pretty.
we kissed goodnight and for me there was no magic. no sparks, nothing. just the ringing endorsement that came in a sleazy text later telling me that i'm a good kisser and calling himself "daddy" ick!
we met on saturday and for me, it was a special little disastoer.
i didn't want to spend time with him and it was obvious. i put my complainer cap on and eventually it got the better of him. we left each other unceremoniously, except for a few sharp words flying through the humid day at each other.
i got home and wrote the following email. i will probably never send it, unless duly provoked!
i think that maybe the changes you have taken yourself and the ones that i have taken myself through are really different. you don't seem like you've changed all that much, 'cept now you have a daughter, wear glasses, and have a big belly.
enjoy your time. honestly, i'm happier sitting alone in my apt. (if i wind up doing that) than hanging out with you. i kind of figured this might be true by our phone conversations. you bored me then, and you bored me more today because i had to look at your mug.my responses to you today, seemed congruous with the energy between us. i found you superfluously talking about you, you, your experiences, you and then...oh, how awful i am...
your knee hurts because you are overweight and out of shape.
deal with it or it will get worse and make you even less attractive.
i'm just telling you how I'M feeling.
jerky, isn't it?
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i went in - asked for hilites, and left a full fledged BLONDE!
my stylist chantal looked visibly shaken by my abundant locks. cirrus, the owner of the salon and "overseer" of the hilite process gave directions to chantal after our consult. chantal seemed to take in what was being said, but on both (all of two check in's during the over three hour process) was told that what she was doing was incorrect - in fact she had been doing just the OPPOSITE. i was nervous!
i literally asked cirrus, "should i be worried" to which she replied no...
besides, there's little a person can do when they are sitting with foils in their hair...so i decided NOT to worry. that was a mistake!
three plus hours, head being jerked around forcefully without a word or even a smile on numerous occassions, my experience was going from okay to...well...not so okay.
the foils came out and guess what!? i'm a blonde now.
cirrus finished up the styling (i.e. twisting my hair and putting me under a dryer - probably because chantal had once again NOT listened to the instructions given (dry her hair 80% and twist it - instead, i was dried completely, but not without some pain of the dryer staying pointed in one spot to burn my scalp - then another...) i was starting to get not only irritated, but pretty pissed off.
i kept my mouth shut. i was in shock. i didn't have blonde ambition.
i was very surprised that neither of the ladies a) showed me the back of my hair/head and b) even bothered to ask me if i liked the color that i'd sat so patiently for three + hours through AND PAID $50 (for "product")?!?!! though they both were quick to say, 'oooh, the color looks great" it sounded fake then, and i know it was...now.
i paid, i put my hat on and i walked out.
i have been wearing a hat since.
i called the salon to see if i could have it fixed. i don't want to be blonde...i WANTED hilites....now my hair is over-processed and yes, i'll say it again blonde.
this morning i rec'd a call back from cirrus. it started nice enough, but went quickly downhill. she kept calling me honey and interrupting me when i spoke. on top of that, i felt as though she twisted my words to make me some kind of vilian (and in the same process making herself and the salon some kind of victim - which is...ugh!) for not liking what had happened to my tresses. she did say it could be fixed...for $30!
unacceptable. she then said she would comp me the product fee (making sure to tell me that it would come out of her pocket), and chantal could put more low-lites in. are you kidding me? do i really want the person who fucked my hair up to "fix" it....another gamble i'm not willing to take. i feel i could do a better job with a box and some gloves...if you know what i'm saying.
the conversation seemed to get contentious from cirrus. i told her that i didn't want chantal working on me again...makes sense i think...why go back to the person that created a bad experience for me? she kept calling me honey and telling me that she's a good business person who works hard. i don't deny that. but what i DO deny, is that i'd be one iota comfortable a)coming back to a place where there are obvious hard feelings against me for finally speaking up and asking for what i want and what is right, and b)that the price they charge for being a hair guniea pig is reasonable. Cirrus actually said to me: go ahead, write a yelp review - if you can sleep at night after doing what that will do to my business (seems to me, she KNOWS that the right thing is NOT being done, i.e. someone aside from chantal fixing my hair at no cost).
PEOPLE, learn from my mistake: DON'T PAY MORE THAN $35 for color as a hair model as i did. GO TO A MORE ESTABLISHED SALON WHERE THERE IS A REAL TEACHER PRESENCE.
today i will go buy a box color and find "normal"
and tonight i will sleep well...thank you :)
oh, and don't trust anyone who calls everyone HONEY...c'mon now!
SALON ALTA is a real DON'T!